Added: Yasir Nathan - Date: 04.02.2022 00:44 - Views: 10153 - Clicks: 3379
Do you feel lonely and invisible in your marriage or other relationships? If so, you know how painful this can be. This is a common experience among those of us who struggle with codependency because we have a hard time being vulnerable, asking our partners for what we need, and practicing self-care.
Often, we internalize feeling lonely or invisible as rejection and shame — blaming ourselves and feeling unlovable. Its taken me some time to get to a place where I can confidently say that when those feelings return because I can guarantee they will I am prepared.
I feel ready. So lets talk about how I got here, so you can too. I knew that marriage was not deed to provide only fulfillment, joy, and a sense of purpose but I needed proof.
So, being the LoveGeek I am, I went searching for research to help me get a realistic view of marriage. Survey respondents were asked which of the following statements came closer to their own views:. For the sake of argument, I will share typical gender-stereotyped assumptions:. While I dont disagree with all of these shoulds, I will say that with all these messages, how can we NOT feel lonely and invisible in our relationships now and then?
Over the years Ive figured out some strategies for coping with loneliness and invisibility that may be helpful to you and your partner as you master the messiness of couplehood, together. Make time to reflect. How are YOU doing? Are you in a funk?
Maybe hungry? Have you been more stressed than usual? Have you been experiencing poor sleep? Check in with YOU. Whats happening in YOUR individual life outside of your relationship? And what is one small way you can take physical, emotional, nutritional, mental or spiritual care of yourself, that doesnt involve your partner?
Be honest. Theres nothing more connecting than getting vulnerable with someone who loves you. Can you tell your partner how youre feeling, free of criticism or blame? Can we make time for us this weekend? Lets talk about what it would take to make that happen.
Connect to your tribe. Back in the day we literally had tribes. All around us, at all times, just so we could function. And this le to disappointment. Reach out to your tribe. Your friends, family, and even therapist feel valued when they can say YES to a request to chat, hang out, or support a struggle. And if you dont have a tribe, its time to create one.
Give yourself and your partner a break. In relationships, we all suck sometimes. Which means at times youre not going to get your needs met. And neither will your partner. Take a breath, and return to 1. Check in with you.
Remember, youre just two imperfect humans trying your best to not suck at being together. About the author:.
She walks them through how to connect deeply while creating space for fun. Robyn helps couples master the messiness of couplehood together and create their very own Epic relationships that last. Her unique blend of traditional psychotherapy, neuroscience and educating lends to her LoveGeek meets BrainGeek title. You can connect with Robyn on Facebook and Instagram.
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How to Cope When You Feel Lonely and Invisible in Your Marriage